After a while one grows weary of constantly seeking novelty. You reach a point where what seems truly novel is the idea of returning to something that isn’t new at all. So I decided that instead of seeking yet another psychiatrist or therapist, I would return to ones I’d already seen. I now have an appointment for Wednesday with the psychiatrist who did such a lousy job of diagnosing me a couple of months ago. Not because I think she can help me, but because I think she should get a second chance to get it right. After all, she is pretty new to the field and has a lot to learn about diagnosis. I will generously give her some continuing education, and in exchange maybe she’ll give me the latest in psychopharmaceuticals.
I don’t know if I’ll be contacting a psychotherapist, new or old. Convinced now that Asperger’s is my underlying ailment, I wonder if therapy can be of any help. As my friend Amy told me a few years ago, I just need to accept the fact that I’m weird. Therapy is mostly about change, not acceptance of the status quo, but maybe it’s still useful if what needs to change is how accepting one is.